To put it in another kind of euphemism, we should put the reasons for resolving the dispute and our own good intentions into it, so that the two sides in the dispute can understand it by themselves.
If you are a leader and two of your subordinates have a dispute, how can you mediate.
For the subordinates who are in dispute with each other, interests are important, and face should not be despised. Especially under the leadership's eyes, everyone is eager to become a strong man who makes the leadership look up to. But for leaders, it's not the most important who is strong and who is weak. The most important thing is that everyone can devote themselves to the common cause. In order to coordinate the relationship between subordinates, leaders can not directly criticize which party and affirm which party, but only use interesting humor to euphemistically express their own tendencies or pains.
One day, Emperor Qianlong, accompanied by his new Bachelor and Liu Tongxun, the elder of the three dynasties, toured the mountains and enjoyed the scenery. Qianlong asked casually: "what is high, what is low, what is East, what is west?" Liu Tongxun, who was full of poems and books, said casually: "the gentleman is high, the minister is low, the literature is in the East, the military is in the West!" When he saw that Liu Tongxun was in front of him, he was very displeased. Then he sneered: "the sky is the highest, the earth is the lowest, the river (he) is in the East, and the river (Liu) is in the West!" Because in the Royal etiquette at that time, the first is the East and the second is the west, which implies that no matter how old you are, Liu Tongxun and I still have the ability to do it.
Liu Tongxun knew his intention, and he was also very dissatisfied. When the three men came to the bridge, Qianlong asked each of them to take water as the topic, break down a word, say a common saying and make a poem. Liu Tongxun opened his mouth and said, "when there is water in the river, when there is no water, there is water in the river. When there is no water in the river, there is water in the river. When there is water in the river, there is water in the river. When there is no water, there is water in the river, but when there is no water, there is water in the river, there is water in the river And a listen, good! The old man called me a chicken! How can he be spared: "if there is water to recite Xiang, if there is no water to recite Xiang, if there is rain and dew to recite Xiang, it will be frost. Everyone sweeps the snow in front of his own door. Don't take care of the frost on other people's tiles!" Warn Liu Tongxun, be careful! Emperor Qianlong heard the insinuation that the old and the new did not agree. The two phases did not agree, which was harmful to the cause of the Qing Dynasty! So he took one hand and faced the three figures in the lake, and said, "listen to the two Aiqing, the lonely family also said to the previous couplet:" if there is water, there is no water. If you don't look at the monk's face, if you look at the Buddha's face, if you don't look at the lonely feelings, if you look at the water. " After hearing this, they were shocked and deeply moved by Qianlong's long en, who was so docile and didn't surrender. And Liu Tongxun immediately thanks Qianlong, in front of the emperor's handshake and words of peace, knot for love.
In front of the emperor, both Liu Tongxun and he longed to be strong and the most appreciated people of the emperor. Therefore, they showed their talents and belittled each other, which made them not united. At this time, Qianlong's direct praise and criticism would certainly hurt one side's face and deepen the contradiction between the two sides. Therefore, Qianlong deliberately recited a poem to convey his wish for peace between them, which avoided the harm to both sides' face and achieved good results.
Chinese PinYin : Wei Wan Biao Da Zi Ji De Qing Xiang
The tendency to express oneself euphemistically
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